ClassiC DefinitionS & CooL MeaningS
1.Cigarette : A pinch of tobacco rolled in paper with fire at one end & a fool at the other.
2. Love affairs : Something like cricket where one-day internationals are more popular than a five day test.
3.Marriage : It's an agreement in which a man loses his bachelor degree and a woman gains her master
4.Divorce:Future tense of marriage
5.Lecture : An art of transferring information from the notes of the lecturer to the notes of the students without passing through "the minds of either".
6. Conference: The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present.
7.Compromise : The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everybody believes he got the biggest piece.
8.Tears : The hydraulic force by which masculine will-power is defeated by feminine water-power ..
9.Dictionary : A place where divorce comes before marriage.
10.Conference Room : A place where everybody talks, nobody listens & everybody disagrees later on.
11.Ecstasy: A feeling when you feel you are going to feel a feeling you have never felt before.
12.Classic : A book which people praise, but do not read.
13.Smile : A curve that can set a lot of things straight.
14. Office : A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life.
15.Yawn: The only time some married men ever get to open their mouth.
16.Etc.: A sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually do.
17.Committee:Individuals who can do nothing individually and sit to decide that nothing can be done together.
18.Experience: The name men give to their mistakes.
19.Atom Bomb: An invention to end all inventions.
20.Philosopher : A fool who torments himself during life, to be spoken of when dead.
21.Diplomat : A person who tells you to go to hell in such a way that you actually look forward to the trip.
22.Opportunist: A person who starts taking bath if he accidentally falls into a river.
23.Optimist : A person who while falling from EiffelTowersays in midway "See I am not injured yet."
24.Pessimist :- A person who says that O is the last letter in ZERO,
Instead of the first letter in word OPPORTUNITY.
25.Miser : A person who lives poor so that he can die rich.
26.Father: A banker provided by nature.
27. Criminal : A guy no different from the rest... except that he got caught.
28.Boss : Someone who is early when you are late and late when you are early.
29.Politician: One who shakes your hand before elections and your Confidence after.
30.Doctor : A person who kills your ills by pills, and kills you with his bills!!
Monday, August 28, 2006
Thursday, August 24, 2006
Monday, August 21, 2006
Funny Applications
Got this in email today and some of the lines literally cracked me up aloud. Some of you might have read this already but here it goes.
_____________________
This is a collection of leave letters and applications written by people in various places of India ...
1. Infosys, Bangalore : An employee applied for leave as follows:Since I have to go to my village to sell my land along with my wife, please sanction me one-week leave.
2. This is from Oracle Bangalore:From an employee who was performing the "mundan" ceremony of his 10 year old son: "as I want to shave my son's head, please leave me for two days.."
3. Another gem from CDAC. Leave-letter from an employee who was performing his daughter's wedding:"as I am marrying my daughter, please grant a week's leave.."
4. From H.A.L . Administration dept:"As my mother-in-law has expired and I am only one responsible for it, please grant me 10 days leave."
5. Another employee applied for half day leave as follows:"Since I've to go to the cremation ground at 10 o-clock and I may not return, please grant me half day casual leave"
6. An incident of a leave letter"I am suffering from fever, please declare one day holiday."
7. A leave letter to the headmaster:"As I am studying in this school I am suffering from headache. I request you to leave me today"
8. Another leave letter written to the headmaster:"As my headache is paining, please grant me leave for the day."
9. Covering note: "I am enclosed herewith..."
10. Another one: "Dear Sir: with reference to the above, please refer to my below..."
11. Actual letter written for application of leave:"My wife is suffering from sickness and as I am her only husband at home I may be granted leave".
12. Letter writing: -"I am in well here and hope you are also in the same well."
13. A candidate's job application:"This has reference to your advertisement calling for a ' Typist and an Accountant - Male or Female'...As I am both(!! )for the past several years and I can handle both with good experience, I am applying for the post .
Smile please :-)
_____________________
This is a collection of leave letters and applications written by people in various places of India ...
1. Infosys, Bangalore : An employee applied for leave as follows:Since I have to go to my village to sell my land along with my wife, please sanction me one-week leave.
2. This is from Oracle Bangalore:From an employee who was performing the "mundan" ceremony of his 10 year old son: "as I want to shave my son's head, please leave me for two days.."
3. Another gem from CDAC. Leave-letter from an employee who was performing his daughter's wedding:"as I am marrying my daughter, please grant a week's leave.."
4. From H.A.L . Administration dept:"As my mother-in-law has expired and I am only one responsible for it, please grant me 10 days leave."
5. Another employee applied for half day leave as follows:"Since I've to go to the cremation ground at 10 o-clock and I may not return, please grant me half day casual leave"
6. An incident of a leave letter"I am suffering from fever, please declare one day holiday."
7. A leave letter to the headmaster:"As I am studying in this school I am suffering from headache. I request you to leave me today"
8. Another leave letter written to the headmaster:"As my headache is paining, please grant me leave for the day."
9. Covering note: "I am enclosed herewith..."
10. Another one: "Dear Sir: with reference to the above, please refer to my below..."
11. Actual letter written for application of leave:"My wife is suffering from sickness and as I am her only husband at home I may be granted leave".
12. Letter writing: -"I am in well here and hope you are also in the same well."
13. A candidate's job application:"This has reference to your advertisement calling for a ' Typist and an Accountant - Male or Female'...As I am both(!! )for the past several years and I can handle both with good experience, I am applying for the post .
Smile please :-)
Thursday, August 17, 2006
Baby Talks.
Most of my friends are married and have kid or two. What I have noticed is that few of them just go on and on about thier kids all the time. Right from what words they learnt yesterday to what they were wearing in morning and what food they eat in afternoon and on what side of the bed they slept in evening.
Like this office co-worker of mine. I am subjected to baby stories every time I come across her. In the begining I was all ears but gradually all the stories have just been getting longer and more details. I really dont know what to say about each of those 384 baby pictures in that album she brings to me.
I do understand that all parents have cute babies and kids mean a lot to them. But do you really have to bore someone to death by sharing every minute details of what your baby did/does/do? I am not being mean here but I really think there is a line at which you should stop. I try to keep a smiling face when these stories start but sometimes even my face gives away. I really wish people know when to stop.
What do you think - Is it just me?
Like this office co-worker of mine. I am subjected to baby stories every time I come across her. In the begining I was all ears but gradually all the stories have just been getting longer and more details. I really dont know what to say about each of those 384 baby pictures in that album she brings to me.
I do understand that all parents have cute babies and kids mean a lot to them. But do you really have to bore someone to death by sharing every minute details of what your baby did/does/do? I am not being mean here but I really think there is a line at which you should stop. I try to keep a smiling face when these stories start but sometimes even my face gives away. I really wish people know when to stop.
What do you think - Is it just me?
Monday, August 14, 2006
Ogle Google
Email forward from a friend which cracked me up. Might not be the best google ad ever but indeed the one to ogle at.
Tuesday, August 08, 2006
Identity Theft
Talking further on Identity Theft, I can relate one of my personal experience. Couple of years back, I used to chat with my net pals on Yahoo chat rooms. We used to hear about email getting hacked and how easy it was to hack any password. I always knew that passwords could be hacked but I didn't realize how easy it was for someone to go into our account. Yupe, until my email got hacked repeatedly by fellow chatter.
He had all the access to our emails and he was proud to showcase his skills openly in chatroom. Smart thing I did(lucky me) was that I always used dummy email id to chat. But what worried me was the claim by this guy that it is just easy to hack any password and that he got the how-to from google itself. I knew for sure that he wasn't a big time hacker. He said he meant no harm but I was already fuming with nothing else I could do. Complaints to Yahoo are not entertained. I guess they just couldn't be bothered.
Some friends said the emails with no username/subject/body was to blame and some said opening some attachments makes you prone to hacking. Whatever but google of this topic just made me realize how easy it was for others to get your information.
Just think for a moment, someone is able to access your email account which you have used in some website around the internet. How unsettling it would be?
Lessons I learned that day:
-- Never store personal information in free email accounts which do not use secure https connections.
-- Keep changing your password quite often.
-- Never make your email id public.
-- Use seperate account for personal correspondence and others for public use.
-- Delete all spam without opening.
And above all, Use upto date firewall and anti-virus protection.
Please protect your information, it is more private, it is more worthy and it is just yours, than you may realize.
He had all the access to our emails and he was proud to showcase his skills openly in chatroom. Smart thing I did(lucky me) was that I always used dummy email id to chat. But what worried me was the claim by this guy that it is just easy to hack any password and that he got the how-to from google itself. I knew for sure that he wasn't a big time hacker. He said he meant no harm but I was already fuming with nothing else I could do. Complaints to Yahoo are not entertained. I guess they just couldn't be bothered.
Some friends said the emails with no username/subject/body was to blame and some said opening some attachments makes you prone to hacking. Whatever but google of this topic just made me realize how easy it was for others to get your information.
Just think for a moment, someone is able to access your email account which you have used in some website around the internet. How unsettling it would be?
Lessons I learned that day:
-- Never store personal information in free email accounts which do not use secure https connections.
-- Keep changing your password quite often.
-- Never make your email id public.
-- Use seperate account for personal correspondence and others for public use.
-- Delete all spam without opening.
And above all, Use upto date firewall and anti-virus protection.
Please protect your information, it is more private, it is more worthy and it is just yours, than you may realize.
Tuesday, August 01, 2006
Deadly Stupidity.
CNN news : A waitress at a bar was checking photo id to see if customer was old enough to drink. Guess what? Customer was flashing driver's license which belonged to waitress herself. Case of identity theft right back to victim's face. Check this link for this news,
http://www.cnn.com/2006/LAW/08/01/bar.id.ap/index.html
How stupid can one get? Check out more at www.darwinawards.com. I am sure you will be carried away by long read. Have fun.
http://www.cnn.com/2006/LAW/08/01/bar.id.ap/index.html
How stupid can one get? Check out more at www.darwinawards.com. I am sure you will be carried away by long read. Have fun.
Thursday, July 27, 2006
Random facts?
The email forward I received said "Good to know these facts". I don't know how many of these are really factual, but thought you might like to read. Here goes:
-----------------------------------------------------------
1. Chewing on gum while cutting onions can help a person from stop producing tears. Try it next time you chop onions!!!!!!!!!!
2. Until babies are six months old, they can breathe and swallow at the same time. Indeed convenient!
3. Offered a new pen to write with, 97% of all people will write their own name.
4. Male mosquitoes are vegetarians. Only females bite.
5. The average person's field of vision encompasses a 200-degree wide angle.
6. To find out if a watermelon is ripe, knock it, and if it sounds hollow then it is ripe.
7. Canadians can send letters with personalized postage stamps showing their own photos on each stamp.
8. Babies' eyes do not produce tears until the baby is approximately six to eight weeks old.
9. It snowed in the Sahara Desert in February of 1979.
10. Plants watered with warm water grow larger and more quickly than plants watered with cold water.
11. Wearing headphones for just an hour will increase the bacteria in your ear by 700 times.
12. Grapes explode when you put them in the microwave.
13. Those stars and colours you see when you rub your eyes are called phosphenes.
14. Our eyes are always the same size from birth, but our nose and ears never stop growing.
15. Everyone's tongue print is different, like fingerprints.
16. Contrary to popular belief, a swallowed chewing gum doesn't stay in the gut. It will pass through the system and be excreted.
17. At 40 Centigrade a person loses about 14. 4 calories per hour by breathing.
18. There is a hotel in Sweden built entirely out of ice; it is rebuilt every year.
19. Cats, camels and giraffes are the only animals in the world that walk right foot, right foot, left foot, left foot, rather than right foot,left foot...
20. Onions help reduce cholesterol if eaten after a fatty meal.
21. The sound you hear when you crack your knuckles is actually the sound of nitrogen gas bubbles bursting.
22. In most watch advertisements the time displayed on the watch is 10:10 because then the arms frame the brand of the watch and make it look=20 like it's smiling.
23. The color blue can have a calming affect on people.
24. Depending upon the shade, the brain may send up to 11 tranquilizing chemicals to calm the body
25. Leonardo da Vinci could write with the one hand and draw with the other simultaneously. Now we know why his pictures were exquisite!!
26. Names of the three wise monkeys are: Mizaru (See no evil), Mikazaru(Hear no evil), and Mazaru (Speak no evil).
27. The only 2 animals that can see behind itself without turning it's head are the rabbit and parrot.
28. The only 15 letter word that can be spelled without repeating a letter is uncopyrightable.
29. Babies are born without knee caps. They don't appear until the child reaches 2-6 years of age
30. The names of the continents all end with the same letter with which they start.
31. Electricity doesn't move through a wire but through a field around the wire.
32. All U.S. Presidents have worn glasses; some of them just didn't like to be seen wearing them in public.
33. No word in the English language rhymes with month, orange, silver, and purple.
34. Raw cashews are poisonous and must be roasted before.
-----------------------------------------------------------
1. Chewing on gum while cutting onions can help a person from stop producing tears. Try it next time you chop onions!!!!!!!!!!
2. Until babies are six months old, they can breathe and swallow at the same time. Indeed convenient!
3. Offered a new pen to write with, 97% of all people will write their own name.
4. Male mosquitoes are vegetarians. Only females bite.
5. The average person's field of vision encompasses a 200-degree wide angle.
6. To find out if a watermelon is ripe, knock it, and if it sounds hollow then it is ripe.
7. Canadians can send letters with personalized postage stamps showing their own photos on each stamp.
8. Babies' eyes do not produce tears until the baby is approximately six to eight weeks old.
9. It snowed in the Sahara Desert in February of 1979.
10. Plants watered with warm water grow larger and more quickly than plants watered with cold water.
11. Wearing headphones for just an hour will increase the bacteria in your ear by 700 times.
12. Grapes explode when you put them in the microwave.
13. Those stars and colours you see when you rub your eyes are called phosphenes.
14. Our eyes are always the same size from birth, but our nose and ears never stop growing.
15. Everyone's tongue print is different, like fingerprints.
16. Contrary to popular belief, a swallowed chewing gum doesn't stay in the gut. It will pass through the system and be excreted.
17. At 40 Centigrade a person loses about 14. 4 calories per hour by breathing.
18. There is a hotel in Sweden built entirely out of ice; it is rebuilt every year.
19. Cats, camels and giraffes are the only animals in the world that walk right foot, right foot, left foot, left foot, rather than right foot,left foot...
20. Onions help reduce cholesterol if eaten after a fatty meal.
21. The sound you hear when you crack your knuckles is actually the sound of nitrogen gas bubbles bursting.
22. In most watch advertisements the time displayed on the watch is 10:10 because then the arms frame the brand of the watch and make it look=20 like it's smiling.
23. The color blue can have a calming affect on people.
24. Depending upon the shade, the brain may send up to 11 tranquilizing chemicals to calm the body
25. Leonardo da Vinci could write with the one hand and draw with the other simultaneously. Now we know why his pictures were exquisite!!
26. Names of the three wise monkeys are: Mizaru (See no evil), Mikazaru(Hear no evil), and Mazaru (Speak no evil).
27. The only 2 animals that can see behind itself without turning it's head are the rabbit and parrot.
28. The only 15 letter word that can be spelled without repeating a letter is uncopyrightable.
29. Babies are born without knee caps. They don't appear until the child reaches 2-6 years of age
30. The names of the continents all end with the same letter with which they start.
31. Electricity doesn't move through a wire but through a field around the wire.
32. All U.S. Presidents have worn glasses; some of them just didn't like to be seen wearing them in public.
33. No word in the English language rhymes with month, orange, silver, and purple.
34. Raw cashews are poisonous and must be roasted before.
Sunday, July 23, 2006
Mideast Crisis
June 25 : Militants dig a big tunnel, attack Israeli Army Post, kill two israeli Army men, take Cpl. Gilad Shalit hostage. Same attack also kills two Israeli civilians. Israel threatens to attack Gaza unless soldier is returned. Israel starts offensive operations in Gaza Strip.
July 12 : Hizbollah militants ambuse Israeli soldiers, killing three and capturing two. Israel calls this act of war and demands its soldiers be released or face consequences. Israel starts to bomb Lebanon.
Simple questions : Who provocates who here? What were they really thinking?
Hundreds of civilians dead, thousands injured, property damaged beyond imagination, fear and starvation around. And what is Hizbollah leader Nasarallah broadcasting to world? That his army of Hezbollah is still intact. That means he is not at all worried about any kind of destruction and misery to people of Lebanon. All for two Israeli soldiers? So who is to be blamed for all this mess?
Hizbollah has been aimlessly firing rockets at Haifa and all over Israeli cities. Do they care for civilians? Are they not trying to provocate Israel as much as they can? Why are they crying foul when Israel responds? I am not defending Israel here. But Hezbollah is more at guilt especially when they started all this shit. May God protect people of Lebanon and Israel.
Questions which I dont get is why is no one in middle east or all those America/Israel bashers asking for return of kidnapped soldiers? Why are they only talking about Israel's response?
No matter what anyone says, terrorist activity is not justified. Be it any group, any country or any religion. There is no justification to any violence that cause misery to innocent civilians.
July 12 : Hizbollah militants ambuse Israeli soldiers, killing three and capturing two. Israel calls this act of war and demands its soldiers be released or face consequences. Israel starts to bomb Lebanon.
Simple questions : Who provocates who here? What were they really thinking?
Hundreds of civilians dead, thousands injured, property damaged beyond imagination, fear and starvation around. And what is Hizbollah leader Nasarallah broadcasting to world? That his army of Hezbollah is still intact. That means he is not at all worried about any kind of destruction and misery to people of Lebanon. All for two Israeli soldiers? So who is to be blamed for all this mess?
Hizbollah has been aimlessly firing rockets at Haifa and all over Israeli cities. Do they care for civilians? Are they not trying to provocate Israel as much as they can? Why are they crying foul when Israel responds? I am not defending Israel here. But Hezbollah is more at guilt especially when they started all this shit. May God protect people of Lebanon and Israel.
Questions which I dont get is why is no one in middle east or all those America/Israel bashers asking for return of kidnapped soldiers? Why are they only talking about Israel's response?
No matter what anyone says, terrorist activity is not justified. Be it any group, any country or any religion. There is no justification to any violence that cause misery to innocent civilians.
Wednesday, July 19, 2006
Mumbai Petition
Generally I don't have any hope for any kind of online petitions. Largely because they just go around and around taking lot of bandwidth and the people who are actually supposed to respond to those petitions hardly do care.
But here is one from Times Of India Group, which says that they will donate one rupee for every signature on petition to the Mumbai blast victims. Looks like a noble cause to me. If you care, please sign. Thanks.
http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/mumbaipetitionpostro.cms
But here is one from Times Of India Group, which says that they will donate one rupee for every signature on petition to the Mumbai blast victims. Looks like a noble cause to me. If you care, please sign. Thanks.
http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/mumbaipetitionpostro.cms
Wednesday, July 12, 2006
Hero in You.
Day after the unfortunate event in Mumbai, most of us are still finding it difficult to get over the gory images set in our eyes. Much more devastation and misery have befallen the families who have lost thier loved ones. Just unimaginable what they must be going through. As we pray God to give them strength, Lets take time to introspect ourself.
Almost all of us are busy blaming each and everything we can think of. By blaming someone or something, we think we have done our job. We think we have paid our respect to fallen ones. We go great lengths talking and writing about the incident and everything related to it. After some time, we forget everything. Newspapers are quick to scream that life has returned to normalcy. Indeed few of us return to our daily chore. But life for unfortunate ones is never the same. So what exactly should we do? Though question and more difficult is the answer. But we can try to make life easier. Atleast we can try. It involves we playing our part to full potential.
Most of us blame the politicians for lot of mess. We may be right but then how many of us have actually cared to vote? We blame Bihar for giving politicians like Laloo. Look at our own Mumbai which is supposed to be one of the advanced city in India. Does anyone know Majority of Mumbai Politicians are Mafias and have no clean record? But everyone knows that the "educated" mass would just be happy criticising from a distance. So these evil men take help of illetrates and poor people with help of money and muscle to get themselves elected. We should know that we are fortunate enough to have power to vote people we like and vote out ones we dislike. But no, we don't care. We spend election holiday giving lectures at home or by dozing off. We like to cry when they directly become a pain to us. Take all family members, educate as much as you can to people around us and vote for right people. Even if your choice of vote does not come up, you know that you have fulfilled your responsibility. If you dont have time to vote, please do not complain about how they do not rule properly.
How many times have we bothered to help anyone? If a poor man is being opressed, someone getting abused, we hardly pause to look at them. Why is it that we only complain when we are at receiveing end? Cannot we take time to rescue someone? True that we lose some of our precious time but at the end of it, we have the satisfaction of giving someone justice.
It is the system around us we have to blame. And who made this whole system? It is we. Ourself. When we give bribe to someone, know that you are as much as a part of corrupt system as the taker of bribe. When you walk away from someone asking for help, know that you are useless entity.
How many of us have bothered to volunteer in any kind of social work? Forget about trying to help regularly, most of us hardly volunteer even once. We are too busy with ourselves and too selfish. But when bad things happen to us, we like to cry out loud.
We have big bucks to spend on movies and fancy restaurents or some sports not even distantly related to us. How about donating a fraction of our earnings to the needy? No, we dont have any money for that.
Mid-day newspaper today had picture of Rani Mukherjee in front page titled 'Did Rani break up Aditya Chopra's Marraige?' along with Mumbai coming back to normal. Do we need such news as what Rani is upto in popular newspaper and that too on day like today? But it is a common headline and content in almost every newspaper everyday. That is because we are more interested in all this glamour. These are the same stars who charge millions of bucks to appear for national heritage programs. How about we all giving fraction of support to our day-to-day hereos who work to make our lives easier. Like our soldiers in armed forces sacrificing thier time with families and taking bullets for us? Do we even have time for them?
Everyone of us has a role to play. Lets not wait until tomorrow, lets not wait for someone. Let us be a good human being, let us do our duty. Just by watching movies like "Rang De Basanti" and appreciating it does not make things right. Be a Hero yourself by being a hero. Every day is your day. You are the character. Not saying you should stand up everywhere, but you should stand up wherever you can. Use every authority you can to stand up for truth, to stand up for help. The day you help someone for anything, no matter in what way, no matter in however small way, know that you are a Hero. That would be a real tribute to all the fallen ones. That would keep many from falling. A responsible you.
Almost all of us are busy blaming each and everything we can think of. By blaming someone or something, we think we have done our job. We think we have paid our respect to fallen ones. We go great lengths talking and writing about the incident and everything related to it. After some time, we forget everything. Newspapers are quick to scream that life has returned to normalcy. Indeed few of us return to our daily chore. But life for unfortunate ones is never the same. So what exactly should we do? Though question and more difficult is the answer. But we can try to make life easier. Atleast we can try. It involves we playing our part to full potential.
Most of us blame the politicians for lot of mess. We may be right but then how many of us have actually cared to vote? We blame Bihar for giving politicians like Laloo. Look at our own Mumbai which is supposed to be one of the advanced city in India. Does anyone know Majority of Mumbai Politicians are Mafias and have no clean record? But everyone knows that the "educated" mass would just be happy criticising from a distance. So these evil men take help of illetrates and poor people with help of money and muscle to get themselves elected. We should know that we are fortunate enough to have power to vote people we like and vote out ones we dislike. But no, we don't care. We spend election holiday giving lectures at home or by dozing off. We like to cry when they directly become a pain to us. Take all family members, educate as much as you can to people around us and vote for right people. Even if your choice of vote does not come up, you know that you have fulfilled your responsibility. If you dont have time to vote, please do not complain about how they do not rule properly.
How many times have we bothered to help anyone? If a poor man is being opressed, someone getting abused, we hardly pause to look at them. Why is it that we only complain when we are at receiveing end? Cannot we take time to rescue someone? True that we lose some of our precious time but at the end of it, we have the satisfaction of giving someone justice.
It is the system around us we have to blame. And who made this whole system? It is we. Ourself. When we give bribe to someone, know that you are as much as a part of corrupt system as the taker of bribe. When you walk away from someone asking for help, know that you are useless entity.
How many of us have bothered to volunteer in any kind of social work? Forget about trying to help regularly, most of us hardly volunteer even once. We are too busy with ourselves and too selfish. But when bad things happen to us, we like to cry out loud.
We have big bucks to spend on movies and fancy restaurents or some sports not even distantly related to us. How about donating a fraction of our earnings to the needy? No, we dont have any money for that.
Mid-day newspaper today had picture of Rani Mukherjee in front page titled 'Did Rani break up Aditya Chopra's Marraige?' along with Mumbai coming back to normal. Do we need such news as what Rani is upto in popular newspaper and that too on day like today? But it is a common headline and content in almost every newspaper everyday. That is because we are more interested in all this glamour. These are the same stars who charge millions of bucks to appear for national heritage programs. How about we all giving fraction of support to our day-to-day hereos who work to make our lives easier. Like our soldiers in armed forces sacrificing thier time with families and taking bullets for us? Do we even have time for them?
Everyone of us has a role to play. Lets not wait until tomorrow, lets not wait for someone. Let us be a good human being, let us do our duty. Just by watching movies like "Rang De Basanti" and appreciating it does not make things right. Be a Hero yourself by being a hero. Every day is your day. You are the character. Not saying you should stand up everywhere, but you should stand up wherever you can. Use every authority you can to stand up for truth, to stand up for help. The day you help someone for anything, no matter in what way, no matter in however small way, know that you are a Hero. That would be a real tribute to all the fallen ones. That would keep many from falling. A responsible you.
Tuesday, July 11, 2006
Mumbai Blasts
The sick, cowardic and bastardized acts of violence on Mumbai trains is indeed deplorable by one and all. Dreams in mind, tired from work all day and making a way home to waiting parents, wife/husband, children, hundreds of them just perished. Whoever did this, I hope do not get away unpunished.
Between the time finding out about friends and families well being, I also saw TV reports of people in Mumbai giving first aid to injured, rushing many to hospitals, distributing biscuits and water to stranded commuters making thier way home. Bravo, my dear fellow mumbaikars.
May God give strength to families of bereaved and May God bring peace in world.
As they say, Mumbai is the city that never sleeps, I hope this time it gives sleepless nights to all bastards concerned with tuesdays cowardic act.
Between the time finding out about friends and families well being, I also saw TV reports of people in Mumbai giving first aid to injured, rushing many to hospitals, distributing biscuits and water to stranded commuters making thier way home. Bravo, my dear fellow mumbaikars.
May God give strength to families of bereaved and May God bring peace in world.
As they say, Mumbai is the city that never sleeps, I hope this time it gives sleepless nights to all bastards concerned with tuesdays cowardic act.
Saturday, July 08, 2006
Wednesday, July 05, 2006
Restroom Ethics
It was lunch time and I was washing myself up in restroom when I saw an office colleague holding some book just walk out without cleaning himself. I asked him as to why he is just walking off without washing his hands. He was taken aback with my yell and replied he was just reading his book. That was silly and lie. But neverthless he washed his hands after that. Maybe because he thought I would tell others.
How many times have you seen fellow coworker or friend or colleague or stranger just walk out of restroom without cleaning himself? I hope you are not one of them. I am not.
As much as it is very "eeeww", we seldom can force this person to clean up his acts. And it is same for strangers and friends. We just feel uncomfortable to ask the person that he needs to wash his hands.
This is one type of person I just despise. Cmon, you are educated, you have and are using best facilities and still dont have time and need to clean your hands? Why? I just fail to understand.
I have not bothered about my friendship, not bothered to act as moral police to tell these sickos to clean up. Either verbally or as a joke in third person.
There are also those, who refuses to flush after use. Lucky for some of us, nowadays automatic ones come to our rescue.
There are Einstein's who just love to read in public restrooms. Private and at home I can understand but that smelly public one?
And if you thought our Einstein's are bad, wait for our worst ones. Yupe, am talking about jerks who love to eat inside the restrooms. If not for some restrictions, I am sure they would be taking whole lunch inside. Really EEEEWWW at those.
How many times have you seen fellow coworker or friend or colleague or stranger just walk out of restroom without cleaning himself? I hope you are not one of them. I am not.
As much as it is very "eeeww", we seldom can force this person to clean up his acts. And it is same for strangers and friends. We just feel uncomfortable to ask the person that he needs to wash his hands.
This is one type of person I just despise. Cmon, you are educated, you have and are using best facilities and still dont have time and need to clean your hands? Why? I just fail to understand.
I have not bothered about my friendship, not bothered to act as moral police to tell these sickos to clean up. Either verbally or as a joke in third person.
There are also those, who refuses to flush after use. Lucky for some of us, nowadays automatic ones come to our rescue.
There are Einstein's who just love to read in public restrooms. Private and at home I can understand but that smelly public one?
And if you thought our Einstein's are bad, wait for our worst ones. Yupe, am talking about jerks who love to eat inside the restrooms. If not for some restrictions, I am sure they would be taking whole lunch inside. Really EEEEWWW at those.
Monday, July 03, 2006
Titanic - Bollywood version
Have you ever wondered what would be in "Titanic" if the same was made in Bollywood? The name of the movie would be "Goa to Bombay". Well here it goes!
* Madhuri has to be Rose and who else but Shahrukh as JJJJJ JJJ Jack. Madhuri's fiance would be Gulshan Grover who mutters "bad man" everytime he sees Shahrukh.
* Amitabh Bacchan would make a guest appearance as the Ship's captain and would be waltzing with Madhuri during the party. Of course, he would not die.
* Shahrukh will be travelling with his sister and 5 other chamchas from college plus 50 extras who are well trained with every dance sequence in the world. * The movie would only last for 7 hours. Thanks to great piece of editing, there would be only 22 songs in the movie out of 30 in CD album.
* The ship would be overflowing with extras whom you normally find in movies that have a court scene full of people or a slum full of aam-janta. The ship will start sinking, not because of the iceberg but because of excessive on-board population.
* The infamous love making in the back seat of the car would be replaced with a song in the Swiss Alps.
* Remember Rose changing her mind about jumping into the water? In our case,Madhuri changes her mind, since...since... the ship is moving along a creek and the water stinks!
* How can we forget the painting scene? Shahrukh would be painting Madhuri's portrait with Madhuri fully covered minus the locket (Censors yaar!). This is to be followed by a dance number, with extras of course, in a art gallery.
* Shahrukh would eventually find his long lost mom Aasoo Devi on the ship. Only during the climax would Aasoo Devi tell Shahrukh about how Gulshan troubled them. Shahrukh would then yell, "Kutte mein tera khoon pee jaaoonga". The ensuing fight would only last for an hour.
* There would be an antakshari for the "drowners" conducted by Annu Kapoor instead of the trio playing the violin.
* Most important!! The number of times the word "Bachaoooo" would be yelled would be a record in the history of cinema. And the masterpiece would be waste of time...ooops waste of money without...
* "Raaaabert...Captain se ja ke kaho ke agar apni maa or bahen ko zinda dekhna chahte ho to naav ko Hindustaan kee sarhado se hamesha hamesha ke liye bahoootdoor le le..."
P.S. the script above is written by some anonymous email author.
* Madhuri has to be Rose and who else but Shahrukh as JJJJJ JJJ Jack. Madhuri's fiance would be Gulshan Grover who mutters "bad man" everytime he sees Shahrukh.
* Amitabh Bacchan would make a guest appearance as the Ship's captain and would be waltzing with Madhuri during the party. Of course, he would not die.
* Shahrukh will be travelling with his sister and 5 other chamchas from college plus 50 extras who are well trained with every dance sequence in the world. * The movie would only last for 7 hours. Thanks to great piece of editing, there would be only 22 songs in the movie out of 30 in CD album.
* The ship would be overflowing with extras whom you normally find in movies that have a court scene full of people or a slum full of aam-janta. The ship will start sinking, not because of the iceberg but because of excessive on-board population.
* The infamous love making in the back seat of the car would be replaced with a song in the Swiss Alps.
* Remember Rose changing her mind about jumping into the water? In our case,Madhuri changes her mind, since...since... the ship is moving along a creek and the water stinks!
* How can we forget the painting scene? Shahrukh would be painting Madhuri's portrait with Madhuri fully covered minus the locket (Censors yaar!). This is to be followed by a dance number, with extras of course, in a art gallery.
* Shahrukh would eventually find his long lost mom Aasoo Devi on the ship. Only during the climax would Aasoo Devi tell Shahrukh about how Gulshan troubled them. Shahrukh would then yell, "Kutte mein tera khoon pee jaaoonga". The ensuing fight would only last for an hour.
* There would be an antakshari for the "drowners" conducted by Annu Kapoor instead of the trio playing the violin.
* Most important!! The number of times the word "Bachaoooo" would be yelled would be a record in the history of cinema. And the masterpiece would be waste of time...ooops waste of money without...
* "Raaaabert...Captain se ja ke kaho ke agar apni maa or bahen ko zinda dekhna chahte ho to naav ko Hindustaan kee sarhado se hamesha hamesha ke liye bahoootdoor le le..."
P.S. the script above is written by some anonymous email author.
Sunday, July 02, 2006
One of one liner Jokes
Q. Why are south indians dark?
A. Because they only watch SUN TV.
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Reading this I couldn't stop my laughing out loud. Ok wait, allow me to clear one thing. I am not making fun of anyone here, definetly not my intention.
But the reason I found this funny is because "almost" all my tamil friends only watch SUN TV. Yes, even in US of A. No CNN, no FOX, no nothing. Just SUN TV.
When I threw this joke at my Tamil friends, some were not amused. Obviously they think someone is promoting STAR TV.
A. Because they only watch SUN TV.
--------------------------------------------------
Reading this I couldn't stop my laughing out loud. Ok wait, allow me to clear one thing. I am not making fun of anyone here, definetly not my intention.
But the reason I found this funny is because "almost" all my tamil friends only watch SUN TV. Yes, even in US of A. No CNN, no FOX, no nothing. Just SUN TV.
When I threw this joke at my Tamil friends, some were not amused. Obviously they think someone is promoting STAR TV.
Thursday, June 29, 2006
Corporate lesson
Following is the snippet of email forward I received this morning. Pretty much like Dilbert joke, a fun read.
CORPORATE LESSON
A young executive was leaving the office at 6 PM when he found the CEO standing in front of a shredder with a piece of paper in his hand.
"Listen," said the CEO, "this is a very sensitive and important document and my secretary has left. Can you make this thing work?"
"Certainly, Sir" said the young executive. He turned the machine on, inserted the paper, and pressed the start button.
"Excellent, excellent!" said the CEO as his paper disappeared inside the machine. "I just need one copy."
Lesson - Never, never assume that your BOSS knows everything.
CORPORATE LESSON
A young executive was leaving the office at 6 PM when he found the CEO standing in front of a shredder with a piece of paper in his hand.
"Listen," said the CEO, "this is a very sensitive and important document and my secretary has left. Can you make this thing work?"
"Certainly, Sir" said the young executive. He turned the machine on, inserted the paper, and pressed the start button.
"Excellent, excellent!" said the CEO as his paper disappeared inside the machine. "I just need one copy."
Lesson - Never, never assume that your BOSS knows everything.
Wednesday, June 28, 2006
Monday, June 26, 2006
Warren Buffet
Todays News :
Warren Buffett, the second richest man in world, today announced that he will gradually give 85% of his wealth(worth over 35 Billion dollars) to Charity.
What I think :
Giving away millions from billions is okay. Giving away a billion from billions may be okay. But giving away most of the billions from billions is just unbelievable. There are no words with me to describe this very noble act of his.
What others do :
When much of elites of corporate, glamour and sports world are busy with lavish spending, this man in his late years is talking of charity. He pledged much of his funds to Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation. This also shows his trust on Bill Gates and his work. Great people, Great work.
My salute to man with golden heart, Warren Buffet!!
Warren Buffett, the second richest man in world, today announced that he will gradually give 85% of his wealth(worth over 35 Billion dollars) to Charity.
What I think :
Giving away millions from billions is okay. Giving away a billion from billions may be okay. But giving away most of the billions from billions is just unbelievable. There are no words with me to describe this very noble act of his.
What others do :
When much of elites of corporate, glamour and sports world are busy with lavish spending, this man in his late years is talking of charity. He pledged much of his funds to Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation. This also shows his trust on Bill Gates and his work. Great people, Great work.
My salute to man with golden heart, Warren Buffet!!
Saturday, June 24, 2006
Rajnikanth, Newton and the laws of physics
Recently I got a chance to see Rajnikanth's new movie Chandramukhi at my friend's place. I dont understand Tamil language but always wanted to see Rajnikanth's movie. 10 minutes into the movie and here is what I saw:
Echoes and flashes in middle of movie yelling "SUPERSTAR... SUPERSTAR... SUPERSTAR".
Rajni as he is called, makes an entry trying to save heroine. He creates a wind twister with help of his legs to fight the thugs. That was it. I couldn't digest anything after that.
Not saying other Indian movies are good and this movie was bad, just that I really feel our superstars dish out good sensible movies.
Here is the related email forward I received sometimes back. N-joy.
WHY NEWTON COMMITTED SUICIDE???
Here is the reason.
Once, Newton came to India and watched a few Tamil movies that had his head spinning. He was convinced that all his logic and laws in physics were just a huge pile of junk and apologized for everything he had done.In the movie of Rajanikanth, Newton was confused to such an extent that he went paranoid. Here are a few scenes
1) Rajanikanth has a Brain Tumor which, according to the doctors can't be cured and his death is imminent. In one of the fights, our great Rajanikanth is shot in the head. To everybody's surprise, the bullet passes through his ears taking away the tumor along with it and he is cured!
Long Live Rajanikanth!
2) In another movie, Rajanikanth is confronted with 3 gangsters. Rajanikanth has a gun but unfortunately only one bullet and a knife. Guess, what he does? He throws the knife at the middle gangster? & shoots the bullet towards the knife. The knife cuts the bullet into 2 pieces, which kills both the gangsters on each side of the middle gangster & the knife kills the middle one.
3) Rajanikanth is chased by a gangster. Rajanikanth has a revolver but no bullets in it. Guess what he does. Nah? Not even in your remotest imaginations. He waits for the gangster to shoot. As soon as the gangster shoots, Rajanikanth opens the bullet compartment of his revolver and catches the bullet. Then, he closes the bullet compartment and fires his gun. Bang...the gangster dies...
This was too much for our Newton to take! He was completely shaken and decided to go back. But he happened to see another movie for one last time, and thought that at least one movie would follow his theory of physics. The whole movie goes fine and Newton is happy that all in the world hasn't changed. Oops, not so fast!
The 'climax' finally arrives. Rajanikanth gets to know that the villain is on the other side of a very high wall. So high that Rajanikanth can't jump even if he tries like one of those superman techniques that our heroes normally use. Rajanikanth has to desperately kill the villain because it's the climax.
(Newton dada is smiling since it is virtually impossible?)
Rajanikanth suddenly pulls two guns from his pockets. He throws one gun in the air and when the gun has reached above the height of the wall, he uses the second gun and shoots at the trigger of the first gun in air. The first gun fires off and the villain is dead.
Newton Commits Suicide!!!!!!!!!!
Have Fun !!!!!
Echoes and flashes in middle of movie yelling "SUPERSTAR... SUPERSTAR... SUPERSTAR".
Rajni as he is called, makes an entry trying to save heroine. He creates a wind twister with help of his legs to fight the thugs. That was it. I couldn't digest anything after that.
Not saying other Indian movies are good and this movie was bad, just that I really feel our superstars dish out good sensible movies.
Here is the related email forward I received sometimes back. N-joy.
WHY NEWTON COMMITTED SUICIDE???
Here is the reason.
Once, Newton came to India and watched a few Tamil movies that had his head spinning. He was convinced that all his logic and laws in physics were just a huge pile of junk and apologized for everything he had done.In the movie of Rajanikanth, Newton was confused to such an extent that he went paranoid. Here are a few scenes
1) Rajanikanth has a Brain Tumor which, according to the doctors can't be cured and his death is imminent. In one of the fights, our great Rajanikanth is shot in the head. To everybody's surprise, the bullet passes through his ears taking away the tumor along with it and he is cured!
Long Live Rajanikanth!
2) In another movie, Rajanikanth is confronted with 3 gangsters. Rajanikanth has a gun but unfortunately only one bullet and a knife. Guess, what he does? He throws the knife at the middle gangster? & shoots the bullet towards the knife. The knife cuts the bullet into 2 pieces, which kills both the gangsters on each side of the middle gangster & the knife kills the middle one.
3) Rajanikanth is chased by a gangster. Rajanikanth has a revolver but no bullets in it. Guess what he does. Nah? Not even in your remotest imaginations. He waits for the gangster to shoot. As soon as the gangster shoots, Rajanikanth opens the bullet compartment of his revolver and catches the bullet. Then, he closes the bullet compartment and fires his gun. Bang...the gangster dies...
This was too much for our Newton to take! He was completely shaken and decided to go back. But he happened to see another movie for one last time, and thought that at least one movie would follow his theory of physics. The whole movie goes fine and Newton is happy that all in the world hasn't changed. Oops, not so fast!
The 'climax' finally arrives. Rajanikanth gets to know that the villain is on the other side of a very high wall. So high that Rajanikanth can't jump even if he tries like one of those superman techniques that our heroes normally use. Rajanikanth has to desperately kill the villain because it's the climax.
(Newton dada is smiling since it is virtually impossible?)
Rajanikanth suddenly pulls two guns from his pockets. He throws one gun in the air and when the gun has reached above the height of the wall, he uses the second gun and shoots at the trigger of the first gun in air. The first gun fires off and the villain is dead.
Newton Commits Suicide!!!!!!!!!!
Have Fun !!!!!
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