Just for laughs

A guy, sitting outside his home about to be evicted from his house, was contemplating how the future would be after he had divorced his wife, lost his children and lost his job.

He notices a crate of beer bottles and walks up to it.

He takes out an empty bottle, smashing it into the concrete wall swearing, "You are the reason I don't have a wife", second bottle, "You are the reason I don't have my children", third bottle "You are the reason I lost my job".

He notices the fourth bottle is sealed and still full of beer. He takes the bottle, puts it aside and says "Stand aside my dear friend; I know you were not involved".

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Two weeks after Santa's transfer into the promotion department, his old boss got a phone call. "You told me Santa was a responsible worker!" yelled the furious head of promotion.

"Oh, he is," she confirmed. "In the year he worked in my department, the computer went down five times and had to be completely reprogrammed, the petty cash got misplaced six times, and I developed an ulcer. And each time Santa was responsible.

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Banta Singh was in court charged with parking his car in a restricted area. The judge asked him if he had anything to say in his defence. "They shouldn't put up such misleading notices,"said Banta Singh." It said , FINE FOR PARKING HERE."

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A drunk Sardar farts loudly in d bar. Man next to him-"Excuse me, You have no decency, you farted before my wife".
Sardar-"Sorry, i didnt know it was her turn"!!

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And this one is in Hindi...

A beggar- 'Oh sundari ! Andha hoon. Sawa paanch rupya de de.. " Husband said 2 his wife- De de, tujhe sundari bola hai to har haal mein andha hai...

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P.S. I havent had chance to go through blogs I visit but I do have you all in mind. Hope you all are doing good. Take care.